Transcript: Beets, Oysters, Canned Peaches

Stump the Chef
Episode “Beets, Oysters, Canned Peaches”

Male Announcer: One seasoned chef, three random ingredients, and three tough judges. Its time for Stump the Chef. Today award winning chef Matt Weaver will set his culinary skills against his toughest opponent yet, lets see today’s random ingredients.
Female Announcer: Oysters, Beets, and Canned Peach’s?
Announcer 1: Now lets play Stump the Chef.
Matt: I think I will try a southwestern approach. It’s not known for its oysters, but what else can I do?
Announcer: And he’s off.
Announcer 1: Jumping right into this I got to say Matt’s got the deck stacked against him today with fruits, vegetables, and shellfish. I have no idea what he has got in store for us. What do you think?
Announcer 2: Well, first of all that is a waste of peach juice, I love that stuff. It is so nutritious, don’t waste it again Matt. But what I am rally excited about here is the fact that he said southwestern. I love southwestern, I love nachos, and I hope that is what he is making me.
Announcer 1: Uh yeah, I am sure we got nachos up ahead of us. My guess is going to be he is going for some sort of bouillon base, some sort of fish stew, probably using the peaches instead of the orange peel that’s normally used.
Announcer 2: Oh well that’s what an educated person would probably say but I have to tell you he said southwestern. He is going to surprise us; you know Matt’s so creative sometimes. I am not even sure if he is wearing pants today.
Announcer 1: And he has taken the tomatoes, onion, and peaches, mixed them up in a bowl there, and added a little squeeze of lime. And at this point I could easily say this might be the basis of a soup.
Announcer 2: With honey, that is such a dumb idea you must be heavily hung-over. I am standing on my nacho theory I am not going to break it chip ,and I will be eating nachos by the end of this I promise. Let me tell you, what’s little known is that all three of these ingredients are historically known as aphrodisiacs. So we don’t know how the judges are going to react to it. And we don’t know how they are going to react to each other.
Announcer 1: Yeah, because nothing gets me excited like beets. He added a little salt, cilantro after that. And I believe that was Chile powder there at the end. At this point this could still be a soup. But I have got my doubts.
And it looks like Matt is pulling out the big guns now, slicing up those beets with a mandolin. And I am glad to see he is using the hand guard here, very sharp blade on these tools you always want to be very careful when you are using kitchen instruments like this.
Announcer 2: That’s very true; you know my Paki lost his left thumb using a kitchen banjo, a much larger much more dangerous version of this.
Announcer 1: You are so full of sh…
Announcer: Sorry to interrupt guys, but its time for Matt’s tangent!
Matt: Oysters are Mollusks. Their shells, highly calcified, surround a soft body inside. Mature at one year, oysters start off as males, but by the second or third year, they become female. Oysters can be enjoyed in numerous ways, such as grilled, fried, or smoked. Now fresh oysters must be live to be eaten. A dead oyster will taste bad and could definitely cause sickness. A closed oyster is good, an open oyster is bad. Give an open oyster a tap, if it doesn’t close its dead. Now my favorite way to enjoy oysters is raw, on the half shell, with some lemon juice, some cocktail sauce, very simple, but very tasty. Enjoy.
Announcer: Meanwhile, back in the kitchen.
Announcer 1: And it looks like Matt’s frying something up here, not exactly sure what he has got going on.
Announcer 2: I think those are the beets.
Announcer 1: You know you may be right, it looks like he soaked those in warm water for a little while, and then drained them, laid them out to pat them dry. And he seems to be frying those up now to get some sort of beet chip going, not exactly sure what part that’s going to play in the meal.
Announcer 2: Maybe a nacho chip?
Announcer 1: Could be, he drenched them in flour before frying them up. Keep in mind that we have yet to see the oysters here I still think we are far from saying nachos are going to be the meal of the day.
And there are the oysters that we have been waiting for. It looks like Matt’s going to be frying those up as well. He has got his flower, milk, and bread crumbs all lined up there, looks like he has got a nice breading on them before deep frying them. You know we got deep fried oysters now, we got deep fried beet chips, I will admit defeat. I don’t think this is a soup, I still think it’s a far cry from some nachos.
Announcer 2: I am going to be eating some nachos tonight and you’re going to be crying in them my friend. But the only person who can really tell us what’s going on is Matt and I want to ask him. Matt what the heck are you thinking?
Matt: Well, these ingredients really didn’t go together, but I pulled a mad scientist move on it. As soon as I put together the beet chip, I think I came up with something really, really good. I just hope the judges really like oysters. If they don’t…
Announcer 1: Well nothing definitive from Matt this time, looks like he is keeping it a little close to the vest.
Announcer 2: Yeah well, a saw book and my wallet says we are eating nachos.
Announcer 1: You make that a C-note, and you’re on.
Announcer: Its plating time.
Announcer 1: Laying out the beet chips here looks like Matt is going for a nice clean presentation.
Announcer 2: Of his nachos.
Announcer 1: Wouldn’t exactly call them nachos just yet, he is putting the fried oyster on top of those beet chips.
Announcer 2: Nachos.
Announcer 1: You know, as soon as I hear Matt call them nachos, I will be more than happy to pay up, but until that moment, I am still seeing beet chips and fried oysters. He has got some sort of…
Announcer 2: Peach salsa, which is spicy, which makes them nachos.
Announcer 1: Nachos those are not. I got to say those are looking pretty good to me.
Announcer 2: You owe me a hundred dollars my friend.
Announcer: Looks good to me, but let’s see what our judges have to say about that.
Matt: Today I made for you some beet, oyster nachos. I took the beets, I sliced them, and I fried them to a crispy chip. Topped them with a fried oyster and then I made a peach Pico de Gallo, a little cilantro and honey. And I think I made a winner. I think you will really like it. I just hope you like oysters. Enjoy.
Joe: I tell you what man, it was really tasty. I really liked the fact that the bitterness of the oyster came out with the honey and the sweetness of the canned peach. And the beet chip, I will tell you what it is a nice contrast all together. I am surprised about what you plated here, I would recommend it to some of my friends as a Matter of fact, and I might dig in for another one.
Shiraz: It’s amazing, taking the beet chip and taking the oyster, they all work so well together. It reminds me of an old Indian dish I used to have. It’s excellent, I would have never imagined that you could take these three things and get that flavor out of it. So yeah well done, and I, just like Joe, am going to have another one too.
Tali: I can’t believe I am saying this, but I love that. The beet chip, I want more. The salsa is fantastic. I actually liked the oyster, you did great Matt.
Matt: Well I heard you really don’t like seafood, so I am really glad you liked it.
Announcer: Let’s tally the votes. Its unanimous, Matt you passed!
Matt: Yeah, yeah I did, I did really well. I turned something I wasn’t sure of into an excellent dish. This is something I would serve to my friends, and I had a lot of fun making it. I hoped you had fun; don’t be afraid of the kitchen. See you next time.
Announcer: That’s it for this episode, of Stump the Chef!